Isabella is married. She married the first boy who asked her, and her parents approved of him. Not that her parent´s consent was important. Nowadays, people get married without parental consent day in day out and that seems to be alright. Isabella likes her parents very much. She knows they are conservative in many ways. That´s why she told Tom her Husband to ask her father for her hand.
Tom the Husband obliged, because Tom the Husband sees reason in conservative structures. He wanted a stay-home wife, then he wanted a stay-home mum, but Helen didn´t survive, so now Tom the Husband wants a stay-home wife again. Isabella tried to please her parents. So she went to college and even got her degree, but she got married, too, and marriage is far more important than work life. Or so Tom the Husband thinks, and Isabella agrees.
In return, Tom the Husband agreed to wait with intercourse till they were married. Tom the Husband doesn´t mind this part of the agreement very much, because he is not the type for excessive intercourse. Isabella sometimes thinks that she shouldn´t have listened to her parents in regard to intercourse. Making love with Tom the Husband is boring. Isabella knows it´s boring, even though she can´t compare it to intercourse with anyone else. Still, she knew it was boring when they finally got to make love. The wedding night, her mother had warned her, was sobering. Not because Isabella indulged in drinking too much during the wedding festivities, but because as she lay underneath Tom the Husband and he did what he called love making, she realized that this was what she had signed up for.
Tom the Husband sweated a lot. He grunted, too. He didn´t say a word. Surely, he must have had some experience before, because he knew what he wanted and he got what he wanted. Isabella didn´t know what to do, because it was the first time she tried intercourse and she really was appalled. It was over within a few minutes. The first two minutes she had felt only pain. Not just the penetration, but also Tom the Husband´s hands on her body were unexpected and painful. He pinched her and he tweaked her and he patted her and when he was done, he took a shower.
Isabella stayed in bed and she was close to tears. She had often listened to her friends talk about their magical first time, how weird it had been at first, but how much they had grown to love it. Isabella knew she could never love this kind of love making. When Tom the Husband returned, he shooed her out of bed and told her to take a bath, while he – and for Tom the Husband this was a more than noble task – stripped the bed.
Isabella decided that this very first time shouldn´t matter much, because she believed that the next time around things would be much better. She wouldn´t be so intimidated, he wouldn´t be as selfish and things would be alright. But even after seven years, things didn´t change for the better. Especially after Helen died in Isabella´s belly, Tom the Husband lost all sense of careful love making. It is not that he is rough or unappreciative, but rather unteachable. Isabella tries very often to bend or touch or squeeze or push or moan or say something, but Tom the Husband doesn´t think much of her improvements. He doesn´t even think it´s helping the matter. That´s because he thinks nothing should change.
It took Isabella and Tom the Husband all long time to be intimate again after Helen died. Helen wasn´t yet a human being, but Isabella knew that she was there and she didn´t want anyone or anything else inside of her. For a long time, she thought she still felt Helen inside of her, kicking and turning, and only when that feeling passed did Isabella allow intimacies again. Tom the Husband understood, or at least he said he did, but Isabella suspected he was getting it elsewhere. He thought it was his right. And while Helen´s ghost still lingered on, Isabella could accept it. But once the feeling started to fade, Isabella wanted Tom the Husband for herself again.
When they are in bed, Isabella tries to bend or touch or squeeze or push or moan or say something, but Tom the Husband thinks nothing of her initiative. So Isabella gets angry and she usually doesn´t get angry with Tom the Husband and she leaves the bed before he can finish. Tom the Husband is appalled. He thinks it is his right to finish, because if he doesn´t, there won´t be another baby and he wants Isabella to be a stay-home mum and not just a stay-home wife. Taking care of the house, Tom the Husband thinks, isn´t enough to fill Isabella´s day and he senses that it is Isabella´s wish to fill her time with taking care of a little baby. After all, she is seeking physical closeness rather often these days.
Isabella stays on the couch that night, and she is hurting. She watches the hands on the grandfather clock move and she stays up until the wee hours of Saturday morning. Tom the Husband stays upstairs in the bedroom and sleeps. He is not aware of what is going on in his wife´s head. He wakes in the morning and is still appalled, but also still strangely aroused. He goes downstairs and finds his wife sleeping on the couch. Tom the Husband stops for a moment to look at her face, so young and relaxed in sleep, but then she wakes. Isabella sees him standing there and she sees his glance and she knows something has changed.
Tom the Husband walks over to her and she kindly allows him to sit down by pulling her legs closer to her body. Tom the Husband feels strange, because he wants her, but this is not the bed and the curtains aren´t drawn, and for once he doesn´t care. So he says silly things to his wife and Isabella understands. They kiss and at first, Isabella quarrels with herself. She doesn´t want to give in so easily, so she hesitates, but Tom the Husband keeps on kissing her and soon she does give in and for the first time ever, Tom the Husband pulls her on his lap and lets her be on top and Isabella enjoys that feeling very much.
Tom the Husband sweats and he grunts, but he is much more respectful than he has ever been. Isabella likes him like that and she likes his hands on her and she touches him and this time, Tom the Husband doesn´t object. Isabella lets him finish. So while he is panting and Isabella is trying to filter all the emotions rushing through her, she hears herself say that the next time around she wants to be on top again, if Tom the Husband would want that, too. Tom the Husband doesn´t know what made his wife change her mind, but he likes it that way and he thinks that it wouldn´t be too bad to let her, so he nods and kisses her and tells her that they should try it again on Monday. Maybe.